The Year of The Lobster

Guys, I can see into my future. And it is decidedly lobster-less.

no-lobster

See, around the time my mom was my age (28 5/6ths), she discovered she could no longer eat lobster. Every time she tried, it made her sick. After a few more go-rounds, she was forced to give up eating the delicious crustacean for good, and hasn’t had a bite since.

(It wasn’t until 15 years later, when she had an allergic reaction during a blood draw, that she identified the culprit: iodine.)

Though I’ve inherited many traits from my mother, I’d hoped I could escape this one. When I later learned that her mother also discovered the same tragic affliction in her late 20s and has lived the rest of her 85 years in a lobster-less void, I knew I was doomed.

For me, it’s not really a matter of if  the Curse of the Lobster will strike. It’s simply a matter of when. I can only imagine the horrors that await me once I cross the threshold into lobster-less oblivion.

I have come to terms with my fate, but I’m not going to let lobster get the better of me while I can still help it. I’m going eat every possible bite I can, damn it.

So, in anticipation of the curse’s arrival, I have dubbed 2014 The Year of The Lobster. Every time I have the chance to eat it, I do. Lobster bisque. Lobster mac and cheese. Steamed lobster. Lobster rolls. If lobster’s on the menu, or on sale at the store, its seafoody goodness is headed for my tummy.

Sometimes, we go out to dinner and accidentally order too much lobster and have to make lobster omelets the next day. Like with this guy here, whose deliciousness was only exceeded by its hefty price tag (which we paid for with the winnings from Zach’s March Madness bracket championship.) (He really, really wanted me to mention that.)

Lobster

Note: No one needs a whole pound of lobster. It’s a trick because restaurants workers enjoy seeing your eyes bug out of your head when you find out what the market price really is.

 

It’s never the most frugal option on the menu, but I have no choice. I must enjoy each succulent morsel of lobster while I can. Because I know one day, probably not too long from now, one of those morsels will be my last.

(EDITOR’S NOTE: Congratulations. This is, quite possibly, the whitest white person problem ever.)

6 responses to this post.

  1. No more lobster??? Sad sad sad day.

    Reply

  2. Ah! Life is but a lobster- yours to behold – yours to deny.B

    Reply

  3. I’m more of a crab leg gal, but the sentiment is the same. Enjoy 2014 – the year of the lobster!

    Reply

    • Luckily, since my mom can still eat crab, etc., lobster seems to be the only shellfish I won’t be able to eat (maybe they have more iodine or something?). Crab (but not krab or qrab) should be a sufficient replacement!

      Reply

What do you think?

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Stumbling through adulthood

Navigating through adulthood without a compass

Books and Bark

the thoughts of a dog and book lover

Miss Diagnoses

One body, many ailments

Piper Dog

This site is the dog’s pajamas because that's what this tagline says.

Sweet Baby V's

Anything you can do, I can do vegan

navelgazer

The greatest WordPress.com site in all the land!

Euphonic Charity

Life, Love, and Excessive Caffeine Consumption

Meaghan McGoldrick

The cynical and sarcastic musings of a 20-something post-grad.

One Active Life

Two Sisters Sharing One Active Life

the ugly volvo

Attempts at Adulthood

'Well, pilgrim ..."

Let me get a few things straight.

Stupid Cupid

three single girls. three cities. adventures in online dating.

Lame Adventures

A Humor Blog

Kevin Modelski Sports

Sports and Culture From the Mind of Kevin Modelski

Jane Eyre Likes Cupcakes

The madcap adventures, missteps, and triumphs of one Ashley Schwellenbach

Sammiches and Psych Meds

Parenthood, Politics, Pedagogy, and Potty Humor

Fashion For Lunch.

UK Fashion and Beauty Blog. Lunch time blog posts. Fashion, beauty & lifestyle brought to your desk!

Alena Dillon

writer, snorter, sitcom watcher

Miss Four Eyes

Everything is better through a pair of ridiculously large glasses

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 1,636 other followers

%d bloggers like this: