Seeing how bears are invading Missoula from all sides (or, humans are increasingly encroaching on bears’ habitat, depending on how you want to look at it), it’s now only a matter of when, not if. Case in point: Black bear tries to come inside Missoula airport How to fend off black bear (Though I still think [...]
Archive for the ‘Uncategorized’ Category
16 Sep
A few select headlines from places in which I’ve lived
Gnomes in protective custody Black bear nabbed near Higgins Avenue What the Hay: Thousands hit bale trail between Hobson and Windham (Also, you’re onl-hay cheating yourself if you don’t check out the extended photo galler-hay here. It doesn’t get better-hay than Pap-hay Smurf, people.)
25 Aug
A (likely incomplete) list of things that are wrong with my car
Only the front passenger-side window rolls down. When I go to a drive-thru, I have to open my door to give them my order, close it, pull forward, open the door again to pay, close it, put my debit card back in my wallet, wait for them to come back with my food, open the [...]
29 Jun
Do you suck at softball? Try The Allison Squires Method For Sucking Slighly Less at Softball!
Hey, you. Yeah, you. The one who just struck out for the third time in your podunk intramural league softball game. I feel your pain. Back in the day, circa 1995-97, I was just as non-awesome at softball as you are. Like, I was really, really bad. I was (am) scared of the ball, and [...]
16 Jun
‘Sick rat tails’ and the people who search for them
One of my fave things about using WordPress for Squirrel Thoughts is that it tracks all the terms people search to get to the blog. And I’ve discovered that some people search for some pretty effed up things. Here, in no particular order, is a selection of some of the most amusing ones. Some of [...]
7 Jun
Seriously, what the eff is going on in Kalispell?
What is it, Kalispell? Is it the fresh mountain air your residents breathe in while admiring the spectacular view of the Missions from their backyards? Is that what makes the people in your town certifiable loonies? Case in point: Zach and I saw this girl walking a horse through the cross walk of a (relatively) [...]
21 May
Squirrel Confession: I’m actually scared to death of the Rapture
And that’s the reason I’m making fun of it every chance I get: to ease my own anxiety. I’m actually terrified all those crazy Christian nutjobs are right and we’re all going to be swallowed up by fire and brimstone. Because Lord knows, I’m not getting Raptured. And I would be seriously pissed if I’ve [...]
3 May
Put the razor down. Now.
Last night, a pretty epic Beardpocalypse went down when, after weeks of threatening, Will Ferrell shaved off Conan’s beard on his show. After more than a year with his scraggly addition, Conan’s back to the baby-faced self to which most fans are accustomed. And I have to admit, I’m a little uncomfortable with it. For [...]
24 Apr
Easter egg hunts = humanity at its worst
“I’m gonna push people out of the way and run over them.” That’s what a 5-year-old at the egg hunt I planned said to a newspaper reporter yesterday. Apparently, these are the sorts of values I’m instilling in our young people by putting on this event. I mean, I’m not really into the whole Jesus [...]
