Squirrel Thoughts

This is Pancake, the 11-week-old bunny Zach and I got this week. Isn’t she the cutest most adorablest fwuffiest thing you’ve ever seen?!?!?! (Warning: if you say she’s anything less, you’ll be added to My List. You don’t want to be on My List. Trust me.)

I’ve always liked bunnies and wanted one as a kid, but my parents would never let me have one. (I suspect they couldn’t handle any more cuteness after having me, though they’ll probably disagree, natch.) And, since having a dog doesn’t really make sense without us having a yard of our own, we decided a bunny would be a good option. And we’re right, so far, as long as she decides to come out of her cage at some point so we can cuddle and spoil and love her even more! I’m sure she’ll get there eventually, so stay tuned!

(Addendum: No need to panic — ‘Squirrel Thoughts’ will remain as such, and will not be changed to ‘Bunny Thoughts,’ as some fans may have suspected. I still wuv me some squirrels, so no worries.)

So, I went to order the fabulous squirrel earrings I mentioned yesterday, and they WERE OUT OF STOCK. What the F, Animal World? Do you expect me to settle with these chinchilla earrings instead?? (BTW, there’s quite the selection of animal-themed jewelry on that site…)

When I saw the option to have them notify me once the earrings are back in stock, I immediately sent this e-mail, which I’m sure conveyed the sense of urgency regarding this matter:

Fortunately, Steve from Animal World promptly replied that they’ll have them back in stock early next week, so I don’t have to wait too long before these delectable baubles are dangling from my earlobes. A wardrobe complete, if you ask me.

I’ve been so mesmerized since discovering these sites that I can’t even remember what led me to them in the first place. All I know is that my life will never be the same.

First up: www.thesquirrelboard.com. Because of this site, I desperately want to find an abandoned baby squirrel, cuddle it back to health, dress it up in fun little costumes, and live happily ever after. And then have someone compose a Broadway musical based on it.

Being totally adorable, that’s what!

That may seem a little bit nuts (pun totally intended), but think about it: It really doesn’t make sense that squirrels are not a commonly domesticated animal. We domesticate just about every other rodent, so why on earth don’t we domesticate the cutest ones? People own rats, for crying out loud! Have you ever seen a rat tail?!? (No, not this kind, but they’re equally disturbing.) They’re disgusting! Squirrel tails are much, much more adorable, yet we don’t keep them in our homes. I’m sensing a new career in the works: Squirrel Whisperer Extraordinaire!

Anywho, while perusing The Squirrel Board, I came across a link for another amazing Web site: www.squirrelsandmore.com. I know. You didn’t think it could get any better, right?

Consequently, I’m now the proud owner of this Beautiful Gray Squirrel Clock by Rosemary Millette, this Gray Squirrel Welcome to the Nuthouse Tin Sign, as well as this Portly Squirrel Garden Stake. And about a dozen other squirrel-themed items.

OK, so I didn’t really order all that squirrel crap, but I did find some squirrel earrings that I’m actually going to purchase and wear with pride. I’m also now inspired to stock up on various squirrel T-shirts, which I’ve been meaning to do for a long time anyway.

As you can see, these discoveries are clearly life-altering. Seriously, when I look back on my life 20 or 30 years from now (when I may or may not be a crazy squirrel lady), I will define it as pre-thesquirrelboard.com and post-thesquirrelboard.com. And I wouldn’t want it any other way.

I’m going to start this post with a disclaimer: I don’t know that much about football. The only team I have any sort of attachment to is the Griz. I know very little about play calls, formations, coaching decisions, etc.; I’m usually just watching whichever player (I think) has the ball (I fall for fake hand-offs quite often). I’m easily distracted by mascots. For me, following the Griz has more to do with school (and state) pride than the nuances of the game.

University of Montana image

That being said, I think I’m gonna like the new guy at the helm for the Griz. I went to the Friday afternoon press conference officially introducing him and his staff, and Robin Pflugrad seems like he’ll be much more media-friendly than his predecessor, Bobby Hauck. (I don’t especially want to rehash the Kaimin incident here, so let’s just say the news of his departure to UNLV didn’t really upset me.)

Coach Pflu spent a good portion of the media stint emphasizing that his players will live up to the standards of both words in the term “student-athlete,” and that they’ll also be active members of the campus and local communities in addition to the Grizzly football community. He also has a good sense of humor. (He quipped a couple of times that “we’re going to run the ball a lot.” I thought he was making light of the fact that we’re losing our star receiver but keeping our star running back for another year. Yeah, that’s how unqualified I am to write about football.)

I know I’m probably reading too much into it, but I hope these comments mean Coach Pflu will not allow incidents of players breaking the law, or otherwise acting in an unsavory manner, to continue to plague this program.

Some people would argue these sorts of qualities are not important in a coach — that the ability to win games trumps all. I don’t agree. I want to feel proud of my team for the way the players and coaches represent the school and Montana, not just for racking up wins in a weak conference. And I don’t want one of the few stories the national sports media write on the Griz to be about the coach stonewalling the student newspaper I worked at. These expectations are not unreasonable, and I hope Coach Pflu lives up to them.