Family Circus is some of the stupidest sh*t ever created. It is funny, however, when people inappropriately recaption them. Enjoy this week’s selection.
(Abyssal's Weblog image)
15 Apr
Camp Anawanna, we hold you in our hearts …
Hey, remember this guy? Pinsky, the salami-loving rebel whose arrival at Camp Anawanna made all the girls swoon on the Nickelodeon classic “Salute Your Shorts”? Ever wonder what happened to him?
Well, he’s apparently the lead guitarist in the indie-alt band Rilo Kiley, creators of such awesome songs as “Silver Lining,” “With Arms Outstretched,” “The Moneymaker” and “Breakin’ Up,” among others.
Rilo Kiley
I don’t have to tell you which one is Blake Sennett, aka Pinksy, because he looks EXACTLY THE SAME.
I’m sure this is old news and all the hip people out there knew it ages ago, but I’ve just discovered it now and am pleasantly surprised by the revelation. Looks like he’s doing pretty well for a former child actor. If only the same could be said for Donkey Lips …
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14 Apr
You have seven bunny buddy requests!
In my quest last week to find as much information as possible on owning a new bunny, I came across bunspace.com. It’s basically MySpace/Facebook for bunnies. No, not bunny owners. The bunnies themselves.
Well, OK, the bunnies aren’t actually posting photos and updating their statuses (they lack opposable thumbs); their owners are. But from the perspective of their bunnies. As in, instead of posting “I just fed Hopperton some lettuce and he loved it!” it appears on the site as “OMB! Mom just gave me some lettuces and it was super yum yums!”
Though you already may have suspected it, I’ll just tell you right now: These people are crazy. Crazy delightful!
Now, I could say the only reason I signed up was because I couldn’t post a question if I didn’t, but we all know that would be a bold-faced lie. I wanted to join in this absurdity the minute I found it, and Pancake was a proud owner of a bunspace.com profile about 30 seconds later.
As expected, Pancake was an instant hit on BunSpace. She had about 25 “bunny buddy” requests the first day, and she’s easily on pace to surpass Zach’s number of Facebook friends. (“Hey dude, heard your pet rabbit has more social networking friends than you do. BURN!”)
Despite all the silliness it entails, the people on the site are just really enthusiastic bunny owners who’ve been very helpful and encouraging. And they’re all rooting on shy lil Pancake to take her first brave steps out of the cage (it has to happen someday… ). Plus, someone posted this photo on her profile:
It just doesn’t get any better than that.
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13 Apr
Cuckoo for Coco!
As I’m sure you probably guessed, I’m pretty excited about Conan’s November return to late-night television. I was a little surprised to hear his show will be on TBS, since I didn’t think that channel actually produced any shows of its own (though I won’t complain about unlimited “Seinfeld,” “The Office” and “Family Guy” reruns). But hey, it’s one of the few channels offered through our extremely basic cable that isn’t C-SPAN/home shopping/Jesus related, so I’ll take it!
Me too, guy in the mildly frightening face mask. Me too.
And before any of you devil’s-advocate types (ahem: Zach) get started on that “but isn’t Conan doing the same thing to George Lopez that Jay did to him” BS, you should know that Lopez personally called Conan last week to encourage him to make the deal, and he is “completely 100 percent on board with this move.” That may just be PR spiel, but having Conan as his lead-in will do nothing but help Lopez, and he knows it. So don’t even start.
And I’m pretty happy about the 11 p.m. start time on the coasts, which (I think) means that it will start at 10 p.m. in the Mountain time zone. As I approach the quarter-century mark, it’s getting harder and harder to stay up past 10:30 or 11. (When my insomnia doesn’t strike, that is, though that tends to happen around 4 a.m. these days. I’m sure you care.) If the show starts at 10, I will be better able to devote myself to watching Coco four nights a week.
I’m also glad the time slot will give Conan a head start on Chin-Who-Will-Not-Be-Named’s show, so Coco can dominate the ratings and his lesser counterpart will crawl into a hole somewhere and die (what can a say — I’m bitter and hold grudges). However, it’s become quite clear that most Americans are bona fide idiots (derrr, typos and stupid people on the street are soooo funny, har har!) and that will never happen. A girl can dream, though.
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12 Apr
You. Got. Squired.
When Zach started law school last fall, we went down to the Iron Horse one evening for a “meet and greet” of sorts. I happened to recognize one of his classmate’s names from the local weekly he wrote for before he started school, and I’d also heard a lot about him because he was my co-worker’s neighbor/friend.
Wanna be my fwiend!?!? Pease!!!!
So, when Zach introduced me to him, instead of saying something normal, like “Hi, nice to meet you,” I proceeded to spew off the facts I’d acquired. The convo went something like this (names have been changed to protect the innocent parties involved):
“Hi, I’m Allison, Zach’s girlfriend.” Hand-shaking commences.
“Hi, I’m Jordan. Nice to meet you.”
“Oh yeah, you’re Jordan Freeman!”
“Yeah…” Withdraws hand.
“You used to write for the Independent!”
“Yeah, I did … ” Begins to eye me suspiciously.
“And you live next to Brenda! She’s my co-worker.”
“Uhh, yeahh, I do.” Starts to slowly back away when he realizes I know his last name, his most recent employer and where he lives despite having met him approximately nine seconds ago.
To hear Zach describe it, “you could see the look on his face grow more and more concerned with each new revelation.” Despite this, I just kept plunging ahead.
And this, my friends, is how you Squire someone.
I realized soon after how awkward I was and how uncomfortable I must have made this poor guy feel, but it was much, much too late. I had effectively freaked him out. I learned my lesson and it hasn’t happened since, but Zach still likes to make fun of me for it and call doing such a thing to someone “Squiring.”
Now, the term has resurfaced in the Squires-Franz household, after we attended another law school function last week (um, yeah, that’s apparently all I do now), and Zach introduced me to a different classmate. And you wanna know what happened next? He Squired me!!
“Hi, I’m Allison.”
“Hi, I’m Fred. You look familiar.”
“I do?”
“Oh yeah, you’re Allison Squires!”
“Yeah!”
“You used to work for the Kaimin!”
“Yeah!”
“You know Mary Lou Smith! She’s one of my good friends!”
“Yeah!”
Squ-IRED!
(You may notice my reaction was not nearly as freaked out as the guy I Squired. This is because I’m used to dealing with such awkwardness in everyday life, so it really doesn’t faze me when others let it slip.)
So, there are two things you can take away from my post on these experiences: a) There’s a new verb out there — “to Squire” — and you should use it every chance you get so it catches on; and 2) If you want to make friends and have people think you’re at least somewhat normal, never, EVER do the aforementioned verb to them. Just don’t.
Squirrel Thoughts 